Saturday, April 9, 2011

Anorexic Again?

It's so hard not to have an eating disorder and be pretty. That's all I want, you guys.
Yesterday, some boy in the North Hall store asked me if I were pregnant. Excuse me? Last night, Alex mentioned to Eric that I've gained weight.

It's hard because there's always the part of me that WANTS to be anorexic, because it makes weightloss as simple as just not eating. I never got to the point of disgustingness during my stint with an eating disorder. I just got skinny.
People love you more when you're skinny. It's a fact that I think about every day. I feel so driven to love and to make people love me, so driven to find every possible way of improving myself to be more loveable.

No matter which corner I turn, this is always the option staring back at me.